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Seeking Time
Oct. 27th, 2014 04:40 pmLately, I've been realizing how much time I've lost in being busy. My children have grown up while I was busy. My mother passed away while I was busy. My friends and I have grown apart while I was busy. My siblings and I have grown older while I was busy.
I seek to simplify my life. Quite awhile back, I wrote about the idea of minimalism, and whether or not I could do it. I decided I probably couldn't become a complete minimalist, but that I was working on cutting back on things. I'm still cutting back on things. I still have way more than I need. I need to cut back on more than just things.
I need to whittle away at my busy-ness, too.
Now, I'm seeking time to work on that. It seems ironic, I suppose, to need time to gain time...to be less busy. Yet, that's exactly what I need. I need to have time to know what I'm doing. I need time to take steps to arrange my calendar better. I just need a little time to make more time.
I'm seeking a few moment's silence every once in awhile so I can figure out where it is I'm careening forward towards.
I know at my age many are putting on the breaks, expecting a quiet retirement, but I'm simply not ready for that. I'm heading somewhere carrying my late-earned BA and even later-earned M.Div., grasping my Ordination papers along with those and hoping they somehow weave together into a magic carpet flying to somewhere that I can make a difference. I can't stop scheduling things like weddings and writing deadlines even though I'm busy trying to earn a living at a lovely stopping off point while I earn the first unit of my Clinical Pastoral Education.
Out of all of this, what will come?
When it comes, will it be too late?
I seek to simplify my life. Quite awhile back, I wrote about the idea of minimalism, and whether or not I could do it. I decided I probably couldn't become a complete minimalist, but that I was working on cutting back on things. I'm still cutting back on things. I still have way more than I need. I need to cut back on more than just things.
I need to whittle away at my busy-ness, too.
Now, I'm seeking time to work on that. It seems ironic, I suppose, to need time to gain time...to be less busy. Yet, that's exactly what I need. I need to have time to know what I'm doing. I need time to take steps to arrange my calendar better. I just need a little time to make more time.
I'm seeking a few moment's silence every once in awhile so I can figure out where it is I'm careening forward towards.
I know at my age many are putting on the breaks, expecting a quiet retirement, but I'm simply not ready for that. I'm heading somewhere carrying my late-earned BA and even later-earned M.Div., grasping my Ordination papers along with those and hoping they somehow weave together into a magic carpet flying to somewhere that I can make a difference. I can't stop scheduling things like weddings and writing deadlines even though I'm busy trying to earn a living at a lovely stopping off point while I earn the first unit of my Clinical Pastoral Education.
Out of all of this, what will come?
When it comes, will it be too late?
